UPDATED Aug. 31 at 10:20 p.m.
-- OK, the DODEA Japan high school football league opened this weekend, and Yokota beat Nile C. Kinnick 55-6, while Robert D. Edgren ... um ... run that by me again?
-- Zama American beat Edgren 40-24?
-- Winless last year, the Trojans beat the three-time defending Class A champion Eagles?
-- And rushed for a school-record 400 yards? And gained a school-record 604 total yards?
-- And Michael Spencer rushed 27 times for 253 yards, the first Zama rusher to go over 200 since ... gad, since Malcolm Hardaway back in the early 1980s?
-- You're kidding, right?