Comedian Mollie Gross wants to know: What’s the deal with military acronymns?

“Why is it that you just can’t just say the whole thing?” she asks of her husband, Jon, a Marine reservist.

“What’s all this BAH, FRG TAD talk? If you don’t tell me what these things mean, I’m just going to make them up for myself, like BAH … Broke A** Homeowner, like PCS, is a Pretty Crappy Situation.”

“SOP? Jon says it’s Standard Operating Procedure,” she said, “but I say it’s the Same Old Problem ... MRE is a Most Rejected Entrée.”

Mollie finds humor in all of military life, and performs a standup routine aimed at military spouses. An interview with Mollie is in the Oct. 26 Spouse Calls.

A comedian and actress in Virginia when she met Jon and married into the military, Mollie left most of her dramatic career behind when they moved to San Diego, except for one thing: “When Jon would go on deployment, I … would go and do my standup.”

“I would get in my car and I would leave my house at seven at night, all dressed up nicely and be gone all hours of the night, so I’m sure my neighbors would wonder what I was doing.”

After four years on active duty and two wartime deployments, Mollie and Jon are civilians again. He is in the active reserve, and that describes Mollie as well.

Mollie’s career, which took her to Hollywood, has drawn her back to the military.
“I changed my entire direction. I redid my entire act and started contacting bases,” she said. Now she performs comedy about military life for military wives, with an emphasis on those whose husbands are deployed.

Mollie said her style as a comedian is similar to Kathy Griffin, but “not as raunchy.” Mollie said she finds it difficult to name a role model in the world of stand-up comedy.

“A lot of female comics … seem to have a lot of anger and hate. I’m kind of limited on who to respect.”

“I say things that are slightly outrageous, but I’m not as crude as (Griffin).”

Mollie said some have asked "Can you take some of the dirtiness out of your act?"

Her response: “It’s PG-13.”

“I’m a Christian, but don’t get me wrong," she explained. "I say things in my act that are wild. No kids are allowed in my shows. It’s an adult show, and we’re all married, you know what I mean?”

“Between me and God, we’re really good. I know where that line is and I don’t cross it."

Mollie said she has a purpose in her comedy.

"If I make fun of myself, I will actually make people feel better about themselves,” she said. “If I can show the wives how bad I was at being a (military) wife, it makes them feel they’re not doing such a bad job.”

She says it is not hard to get military wives to laugh, even during deployment.“They come looking for it. It’s wild. They want to laugh. They’re ready for it.”

Her husband's response is a different story. Does he laugh at her jokes?

“Okay, John’s a Marine,” she said, pausing for effect. “He doesn’t laugh.”

“I know he thinks I’m funny if the corner of his mouth goes up. He’s such a Marine, he just so quiet and stoic.”

“You know what’s great about that? I don’t have to be funny for him, and I know that he would still love me.  I have to be on all the time, but he just wants me to be me."

Mollie has compiled a comedy CD, which will debut in December. Her book, based on her life and comedy, is due out next year, she said, and a television project is in the works.

Comedy is healing, Mollie believes.

“When you laugh, it heals you," she said. "It gets your endorphins going, you release stress. When you cry, you shut down.”

For more information about Mollie, her touring schedule and booking information, see her Web site: www.molliegross.com

There you can find video clips of Mollie's act. As Mollie said, her comedy is recommended for adults.

For more personal information and Mollie's blog, see www.myspace.com/janewaynecomedy.